Call Me Out 2017

[yamadori]

【the ❝CALL ME OUT❞ meme】
a roleplay meme to inspire muses.

♛ i'm trying to focus on these characters in particular, but i will pull out one of these if you ask for them! ♛ call the characters out by putting their names in your subject line! i can also post starters if you need them ♛ gen, shipping, crosscanon and crau are all fine - but please, no smut. ♛ if you need some prompts, i will be working on a list to post to the comm and putting a link here soon! meme code.

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[timaeus_testified]

[Dirk's brows come down as he pushes himself out of the chair and gestures for Komaeda to follow him out. A guy on Derse that is a registered Prospit dreamer. That sounds familiar. He needs to get to his ship hidden near the moon and access the data on the computers to be sure.]

I don't want to write your leader off just yet. This game is fuckin weird about death and seeing something like that while you're in your dreaming body is too important to ignore. In short it's relevant. I just don't know how, yet.

We need to get to Derse. I have my transport parked not far from it hidden in the shadow of Derse's moon. If Prospit's moon is fine. Then we have a lot more to bargain with than you think.

Can you godtier still? What's your title.

[zanka]

[Something squirms in his stomach. Writing it off had been exactly what Komaeda planned to do, but clearly that's not going to be happening. This is a hope he doesn't want, but it's fluttering in his chest nonetheless.] You don't suppose Skaia would give him extra lives like a true video game protagonist, do you? [It's meant to come out joking, but the wavering that bellies the words gives... something away. He refuses to put a name to what it might be.]

As for getting to Derse... [Komaeda breathes in deep as they exit the room. Out here, he can hear that musical hum that constantly curves through his land like a river. Nearer or farther depending on how it bends. Listening to it is... nice.] I suppose it would defeat the purpose if you simply left me behind, but I don't think I'll be getting to sleep anytime soon. [Not with all these worries clamoring noisily in his head. With the words he says next, though, Komaeda shoots him a cheerful smile.] You could knock me out, if you'd like, though! I wouldn't mind in the slightest, especially if that would be more convenient for you.

[The smile falters, ever so slightly.] Although it might be more trouble than it's worth. I... probably wouldn't do you much good even if I accompanied you. I am still able to godtier, but... [Komaeda exhales through his nose, hard, before straightening up and looking Dirk right where he imagines his eyes to be.] I'm the Heir of Light, but it's a liability at best and non-existent at worst. From a time I was too young to even remember, fortune has never smiled on me. If anything, it's done precisely the opposite. [He forces a smile again, small and self-deprecating.] I'm sorry that of all the ones to call you out, it had to be me, the one whose the most useless... I'll help to the best of my abilities, but the best I can do might just end up being staying as far away from you as I can, lest I make things more of a mess than they already are.

[timaeus_testified]

[Damn that's some issues. Not that he's capable of judging on that one. He has the market cornered on self loathing. Dirk pushes his shades up with a finger as he opens up his sylladex.]

Back the fuck off yourself. I know some Light players and they're pretty fuckin formidable. Having luck as your deal isn't as useless as you think it is. We're all useless at first. Most can't figure out their powers until shit hits the fan. Heirs take a while since they basically are their aspect.

[His rocketboard hits the flat ground with a thud. Dirk hops up onto it and motions for Komaeda to join him. Before he'd agreed to show himself. He'd set up Roxy's windows as Rose had suggested. ...and all the other things she had talked about.]

Anyway hop on. We're going the direct route.

[zanka]

[Something- something in Komaeda reacts to that, makes him want to curl into himself. He shouldn't want it, but no one ever tells him that. Some of the few that ever had, in their own ways, were Nanami, Yukizome.

Hinata, when he'd gotten here and seemed a little bit more alive than back home.

His throat is tight.]

It's the way it's always been. Even if I wanted to, I doubt I could change that. [He says it simply, shutting his eyes. He'll let Dirk decide whether he means his luck or the way he speaks of himself.] But I'll... try to believe you. You're far more knowledgeable about this than I am, so even if everything in me says I won't be able to do anything worthwhile... [Komaeda opens his eyes.] I'll choose to trust you in this.

[When the board drops, he jerks a little bit and shoots Dirk a disbelieving glance.] D-direct route...?! [Even as he questions it, though, Komaeda is moving into place behind him as directed. It isn't trust if he doesn't act on it.] You mean- this will take us through the Veil itself?

[He shouldn't be surprised about anything anymore, really, but. Still. It had been hard to get him ruffled back home, but now it seems like he's getting thrown for a loop left and right.]

[timaeus_testified]

No. Our route will. [Dirk pushes his shades up as he swaps from his godtier gear to his normal clothes. He'll need his arms and body to steer or he'd arm himself. No matter.] Hold on tight.

[The moment he feels the right kind of hold they're off carving a path through the sky. He cuts abruptly down in a steep dive. On the ground below a white four paned window rests with a soft white light coming from it. They smash through it into the void beyond. A blonde haired girl in the robe of a light player tossed a pair of sylladex cards at him. She nods once to Komaeda and returns to the side of the silent time knight at her side. Dirk gives Dave a silent acknowledgement before they burst back out a window on Hinata's planet.

The land of Mirrors and Temples stretches out below them as they pass through another window. He stores the cards as they come through another window and onto the main deck of his silent ship hidden in the shadow of the towed Derse moon.

He lands the board in a smooth slide and looks over his shoulder at Derse a ways off. Red lines of power, The Red Miles, are reflected in his shades. They crawl over the planet like flowing lightning.] Made it right before the countdown finishes.

[He slips off the vehicle and onto the deck. The Pride named so by smart ass Strider brothers is a sleek ship that only another Derse player could spot. Designed to take advantage of the blackness between the cracks in the Furthest ring, speed is its weapon of choice. Dirk brings up displays as he heads for the inside of the ship.] That was the Seer of Light.

Operation Save your Asses is all laid out according to her designs and the light of her vision. Once we witness the end of the countdown on Derse's fate you and I have a hot date with a stone slab.

[zanka]

[Komaeda does as he's told, but only has a chance to let out a small noise before they're off and-

And... he doesn't know what he was picturing, but this feels nothing like it. Air lodges itself in his throat as they sweep down, and his stomach feels like it's about to shoot through his body. There's something that's both exhilarating and terrifying about this, and it's all Komaeda can do to resist the urge to hold on even tighter.

He squeezes his eyes shut as they crash through the window, but that part isn't as bad as he might've expected it to be. For some reason he can't really explain, his breath catches when he sees the girl - or rather, the sun emblazoned on the front of her robes. But Komaeda returns her nod all the same. He thinks in passing that she and the boy beside her bare some kind of resemblance to Dirk - relatives? - and then they're bursting through another side before he can ponder it anymore.]

Oh. [Dirk probably doesn't hear it, but it comes out strangled. Komaeda would have to be dead to not know this Land, and maybe even then. It's a visceral ache that hums through him, harsh and unforgiving. It's not that it was any easier to not think of Hinata being gone anywhere else, but here in his world, it's utterly impossible.

And even if he can mask most of his reaction, Komaeda can hardly stand it.

The relief he feels when they leave is so palpable that he can almost taste it, but that quickly gets overshadowed at the surprise of suddenly being able to see Derse. Just like that, they're there.] A countdown... You've seen this before, then. [He doesn't phrase it like a question.] I'm sorry for whatever misfortune befell your session, but I should thank you again for answering my call. I think we're in good hands with you.

[His eyes roam the ship with curious eyes as they enter.] If we're following her roadmap to victory, I assume she must be one of the formidable Light players you spoke of. [There's just the slightest hint of amusement there in his voice as he says it.] What's her name? She looks a little like you. As well as the young man that was with her.

[His focus is on following and the idle musings, so Dirk's words don't register right away. But when they do, something in his chest freezes. Komaeda ignores it. He doesn't fear death necessarily, not for the sake of everyone else. Doesn't even really fear being the one to do it himself, if he has to.

...And yet...]

I certainly trust a Seer of Light's plans more than my own thoughts, but what's the purpose of coming here if I need to Ascend? [There's only the briefest hesitation before he brings up his planet's fate - because he can read through the lines enough to know what Dirk is talking about here.] Is there something about witnessing the end of Derse that has some importance?

[timaeus_testified]

That's the idea. [View screens of Derse and the countdown that is down to a minute, turn on, showing the destruction in crystal clarity. Dirk pauses before the chair to the console as the Red Miles dive down, ripping into the planet as they deal out death.]

Specifically, it's something you need to see before you rise up. I don't know what it is. She didn't say. [He draws out a white orb and turns it over in his hands.] It's not that this plan couldn't go to shit. It's a plan. They never go as you want them to.

It's just the best charted out course. In the end it's up to all of you to find your way through. She's related to me by complicated means. They're Rose and Dave. Light and Time.

We're fucking stalling for time so ask me whatever while I get ready to fit this into the console. It will show us what the Jesus h dick is so important here.

[zanka]

[He watches, and it tears at him. Komaeda wasn't sure if he would feel anything, at first, but actually seeing it happen is something else entirely. As if the last of their hopes are fading, even if Dirk has given him enough reason to believe otherwise. But it's that fact that he holds onto. Even something good can come out of this destruction.] They seem to have a way of doing that, don't they? The plans of the rest of my team are likely proof enough of that.

[Perhaps they wouldn't be here now, if that were the case. But it doesn't serve any purpose to linger on it now.]

But the best plan available to us will be enough. [It has to be. It will be.] If I'm necessary for making it come to fruition, I'll gladly play my part.

["Rose". "Dave". "Dirk." All foreign names. Probably American, but who really knows? That might be rude to ask. Picking apart what "complicated means" entails definitely would be, though, so he lets it alone for now aside from an interested hum. Perhaps if there's a more delicate opening for it later, he'll choose to make a dig at it.]

Such power you grant me. Aren't you concerned I'll take advantage of it? [He lets the mild amusement from before color his voice, even if it's a bit weaker. Talking to Dirk is... engaging. That's probably the best word for it. And it offers such a wonderful distraction from the display showing everything literally coming to pieces in front of them.] I'll give you benign questions to start with, though. That orb you're going to use - what is it, and how did you get a hold of it?

[timaeus_testified]

I got it from Rose. She got it from a box, passed to her through The Furthest Ring. Who it belongs to you're better off in the dark about that.

[He looks up, his dark shades sliding down his nose. His orange eyes narrow, something sharp in their depths.] No. Before you start trying to get me to tell you. Don't. It's safest for you not to know.

[Dirk looks to the screen reflecting the damage as the countdown continues to wind down on the other screen. He taps the orb.] This orb shows what is. Consider it the gateway to omniscience. In the hands of a seer or like myself a very good engineer, you can see pretty damn far.

We Derse players can see shit without it but it's patchwork and risky. There are horrors in the Ring. They want to use us.

Without Prospit this is the safest eye in the sky.

[zanka]

[It comes out a little strained, but Komaeda can't help but laugh in surprise. Is he really so easy to read, or is Dirk just that good? Perhaps it's some combination of both.] Being denied the knowledge makes me want to know even more. But if you insist so strongly, I won't press.

[He takes in the orb with a thoughtful eye.] What a magnificent gift you've brought, to be able to see so far. [For a moment, Komaeda's voice softens.] I've seen without this eye before, and I'd rather not do it again unless I had to.

[What he saw was frightening and confusing, and just gave him glimpses of answers that only made sense to him once it was too late to stop any of it from taking place.]

The horrors that dwell in the Ring... [He hesitates. Wonders if he even wants to know. But they need to pass the time anyway, and it can't be any worse to swallow than anything else Komaeda has learned. Right?] Did you ever find out their goal during your session? Our players, including myself, have only brushed with them. But never found out what they really wanted us for.

[S] Breath of The Infinite...loading

[timaeus_testified]

[The orb is slipped into the slot and twisted. Screens shift, all of them snapping together to form a window. Each screen plays a different scene, flickering from one to the next until the divide between them fades away.

The view is filled with shining cracks that spread out like something vast had hammered into space hard enough to crack it. At the heart a green blazing sun shines and the view sweeps in like a bird diving for a closer look. A red robed girl floats before the flickering solar flames and extends her right hand out. Curling orange horns and delicate red butterfly wings flutter as she contains part of the flame in arcing circles of red energy. The parcel vanishes into a card that pops out of existence.

Red fills the screen until the view pans out to a mirror, sitting at the edge of a winding staircase. Blood smears over the glossy surface in dark red messy streaks. It runs down to spread in droplets over the first stair. Up the view goes towards more blood dotted stone steps. It cuts out to yellow overalls and extends out further.

Grease smeared hands slap down against the flat surface of a worktable. Up the view slides over polished metal and up to metal sculpted abs. A dark coat. Lightning arcs from open fingers that close into fists. A booming laugh shakes the very air as the robotic monstrosity rises up and roars, "Niiidaiii Neeeekoomaruuu!"

Down it spirals to a battlefield littered with the bodies of black and white soldiers. The light of the battleships flying overhead are reflected in rounded glasses. A wooden sword rises into a guard position as a smaller figure stands besides the woman holding her sword at the ready. The army surges forward and she bursts into motion like a pebble launched from a sling.

Blood hits the field but the view is sweeping up stone stairs littered with it to a slumped figure at the top. Every breath taken makes the green eyes a little less full of life. They darken, more and more.

In their depths lies Derse. Red Miles snarl over the surface and rip into the land, impaling citizens but far below someone watches it all in silence. A lone figure stuffs her black crown tighter over her head and hurries down the stairs. She breaks into a run at the crash from above. Down a hall lined with green flame filled pipes. Ladders are descended. Scans taken over her ring to allow her beyond.

Down she moves, into the depths. The pipes connect to a pod built onto a green stone slab. She pauses at a console and punches in a series of commands. Gears click as the pipes open and the obscured chamber of the pod is filled with green flames. They swirl violently just as a deafening crash resounds high over head. She gives it one last glance then departs down a side hall, away from the fluxing light. Something vast and terrible descends with claws extended. It never reaches the pod.

As the green eyes turn empty.

Red ones snap open within the pod and flare.

Derse explodes in a surge of emerald flames and the ship rocks with the force of the impact. Dirk grips the side of his chair and swears up a storm while the impact continues to rattle the vessel.

The adversary, a black and white monster bear breaks out of the flames and slams into a floating piece of debris. A vortex forms at the epicenter of where Derse had been. Green lightning rips from it like claws as someone rises from it. Cloaked in a green robe, their cowl drawn low to hide their identity. Yet the symbol of Mind stamped at the front should be unmistakeable. Jet black hair fans out like living threads of wind. The red and green daggers in the Mage of Mind's hands spark with Green Sun fire and the red blaze of Time. He stabs one in the monster's direction, and the creature lets out a snarling laugh.

"Oh, oh how disbearing! Don't you know that heroes are supposed to end up dead?! Nyahhahahaha, weren't you dead before all this began? Hey-"]

pretty sure I broke a thread somewhere to get this icon in here but #yolo

[zanka]

[Komaeda's mouth is dry as he takes in the display. It's a lot of information to take in, even for him, but Komaeda observes it all with a quick, determined eye. There's so much happening that that he doesn't know - are they things that have already happened, that will happen, or are they happening right this very moment? Perhaps it's a little of everything, though. He watches the girl with curling horns, someone he doesn't recognize, though his eyes are trained on what she does with the flames of the Sun. That's a sylladex card. But just who, exactly, is she sending it to? He doesn't have the time to ponder whether it's good or bad, because then it's flashing to people he knows.]

Souda-kun and... Nidai-kun? [His voice chokes on the latter's name. What's going on with this is an even more pressing question, because... Did Souda build a robot of Nidai, or...?

He can't afford to linger on the alternatives. Nor is he given the opportunity to, because this is a scene he knows. One he had gotten to only once it had been too late.

Pekoyama, magnificent as always, and Kuzuryuu right there by her side. The sight of them is reassuring for the briefest moment, but it's short-lived because Komaeda knows what comes next if the orb chooses to show it. And it doesn't let him down.

Komaeda thought he might be better prepared. He's seen this scene before, after all. But he's not, and it's all he can do not to tear his eyes away when the screen shows Hinata clinging to life. But he forces himself to keep watching, hands clenched tight and stomach playing tug-of-war between pain at the sight and disgust at himself for feeling pain at all. But the eye of the orb surprises him in the way it transitions to Derse, because that's...

That's what's happening right now, outside.]

The queen... [His voice finds him again, unexpectedly.] Right now, is she... [But his words fade once more as he watches, mildly confused. Where is she going? Is this a defense mechanism to stop the Miles? He'd thought nothing would cease their destruction, and yet...

His thoughts catch, painfully, as the scene shifts back to the life fading from Hinata's eyes - only for a small sound to escape him at the pair that takes their place.

Ah... What... What's this feeling in his chest? Why is his heart beating faster, just from seeing those strange red eyes...?

Komaeda nearly says something, he doesn't even know what, but it's stolen from him as the ship rocks violently. With a yelp, he grabs onto the chair just in time as Dirk's string of curses escape him. Komaeda would manage a shaky laugh if the breath hadn't been stolen from him.

Any doubts that this is in the future or the past leave his mind, though. This. This is happening right now.

The air gets back into his lungs as he adjusts to the ship being throttled around, but it escapes him in a breathless gasp when he sees the figure. Because that's not possible. Can't be possible, has to be some sort of mistake-]

Hinata... kun...

[The name shouldn't leave him, because this shouldn't be happening. But it does, because Komaeda knows, deep down, that this is the truth. That the shameful and foolish hope he held in his heart, blossomed from those dreams he had thought to be taunting him, had not been so foolish after all.

The scene before him should make no sense, and yet Komaeda understands so much of it almost implicitly.]

...He's. He's out there. [The breathless quality hasn't left his voice. A sense of wonder seems to underlie the words, not even paying heed to the way the vessel they currently occupy is still shuddering.] Hinata-kun is... still alive. And he's about to fight, or is already fighting.

[An insane urge strikes him. To go out there and fight at his side, be with him again. What could he possibly do against that bear? He'd be nothing more than a hindrance. But even as Komaeda pushes it down, the feeling of it persists.

He... wants to see him again...]

So. This is what she needed me to see. [The shaky laugh finally manages its way out of him.] I think I understand now.

[He'd had hope before. Had never stopped believing. But it's different now. It thrums steadily through his veins, powerful and alive in a way it hadn't been before.]

Whoops

[timaeus_testified]

[The rattling stops and he pulls the orb from the slot, tucking it away. The view snaps to real time. Green lightning arcs up Hinata's body as it flickers green like the emerald sun. His lips move but, whatever he's saying there's too much interference to make sense of it. Dirk checks the readings and pushes himself out of his chair.

His godtier clothes snap back over him as he draws his katana. The green light reflects off its steel surface.]

As you are now you can't assist the newly Guardian charged Mage out there. As you will be is another story all together.

[Dirk adjusts his gloves, ignoring the faint tremor in his hands. He's about to stone cold murder a guy. His grip on the sword hilt tightens. The white knuckles hidden under his half glove.]

We'll just be taking a walk this time.

[zanka]

[His breath catches ever so slightly as he listens to Dirk. After he Ascends, then he...

Komaeda swallows, hard, eyes wandering to the display. Dirk calling the figure cloaked in green by his class only makes it that much more real. It's a wondering, disbelieving beat that his heart thuds to. Hinata. Hinata is actually out there...

And he's going to help. The thought of that makes his throat dry, but there's an electric sort of feeling traveling up and down his veins. To be able to be part of something like this is...]

If I can be a stepping stone for something as great as this, [his voice is breathless] then I will gladly Ascend.

[However, Komaeda's eyes catch that slight tremor. It's the faintest movement, faint enough that another pair of eyes might have had difficulty seeing it at all, but he's too observant to let something like that slip past his notice.]

...If you're afraid of taking my life, don't be. [His voice is gentle.] For the sake of the others, for the sake of hope... I'll gladly lay down this life of mine. And really, it isn't a true death. For my entire life, I've been a hindrance. At best, lower than trash. But you're about to forge me into something new - something that has purpose. A reason for existing.

So! [His hands clap together as he steps back.] Let's walk, then. [He doesn't start walking, waiting for Dirk, but he does turn to the side slightly. Komaeda casts a grin over his shoulder.] I'm ready to cast this old life aside.

[timaeus_testified]

[It stirs up an old self loathing that whirls inside him like a storm. Dirk walks away. Away from Komaeda and his old self that saw death as a means to an end. He walks slowly, and the world gives way as Jade teleports them to Komaeda's planet. He walks on quiet.]

Just because your life didn't have any purpose before, doesn't make it lacking in value. I'm not forging you into anything. You have to do that. All I'm doing is cutting away the physical limits between you and your Ultimate self. Something you could have done on your own.

This session is about you finding your own way. You have questions only you can answer. You don't know who you are. So you're seeking one thing to make it all make sense. Seek yourself once you rise up.

[He comes to a stop before the quest bed and turns around.]

The real you.

[zanka]

[Something in him nearly reacts, and sharply. Dirk doesn't know anything about him. Has no idea just how worthless he is, how sickened he should be simply by his proximity to Komaeda alone. But he doesn't let it show on his face, and it's for the very same reason that Komaeda lets it go. Because Dirk doesn't know, has no way to. They've only just met, after all.

Perhaps if they spend enough time together, he'll come to understand.

But there's one thing he has to leave Dirk with, at least. Disappointing, that he can't keep himself quiet about certain things after all, but nothing to be done about it.]

Trash is trash, no matter how pretty of a bow you put on it. [The smile he shoots him is gentle, however. A juxtaposition to the harsh words he directs at himself.] Even if someone can find worth in it, that won't change. Though I appreciate that small kindness you speak of me with.

[Even as he says it, though... There's a difference in his tone that should not be there. Komaeda frowns slightly at the realization. A sliver of doubt wedged between the harsh words and his heart, driven there by Dirk and the things he's told and shown Komaeda. And the hope of seeing Hinata, changed and alive. Because the game chose him, summoned him, and it does many things - but it does not make mistakes.

Something he had ignored during his time trying to survive, until this moment. Until it's thrust into his face this way, and he can't look away.

Sburb chooses all of its children, and all of them will have a part to play, no matter how big or small.]

But I suppose... [His words are thoughtful, slow, as he lifts a hand up in the air. Stares at the light threading through the spaces between his fingers.] ...If I'm here, even able to have this conversation with you right now... If I was blessed with being able to view such a wondrous sight earlier... Finding my way is something that even someone like me can manage.

[His hand drops, and Komaeda moves to sit himself at the edge of the stone bed.]

I could have done this before, yes. But what reason is there to do so if it wouldn't help anyone in the end? That's what you gave me a chance to see. Even if it's difficult for me to imagine, you've shown me enough that I believe I can do something to help our session survive.

And if finding myself is the means to that end, to keeping everyone alive... I will not fail. [Then, a soft huff of laughter.] I hope my real self can live a life that is worthwhile... or at least worth more than what mine has been up until now.

[timaeus_testified]

You idiot. [There's no heat to the words as Dirk stops before the yellow and gold stone slab. His knuckles are white around the sword hilt. Why is it the smart ones are always so destructive? Is it a sign? He doesn't fucking know. He's seeing too much in the way Komaeda talks. He wants to grab him by the shoulders and shake him while talking low about how worth is not about the things he had once believed and Komaeda still does. Raw words that would sear their way in and remind him of every miserable failure he has ever had. Everything he has ever done laid bare, to be judged and sentenced.]

The real you just has his shit semi-together not an entirely different person.

[Kindness? No, he's a cruel bastard that can't even be honest most of times and talks in riddles. Never revealing his real feelings on a damn thing. It's all like one big joke. His hand lands on Komaeda's shoulder and digs in,]

Maybe. Make sure to keep yourself alive too. Despite how it seems...you do matter. More than your damn well know. Now stop haunting me with the past.

[Whatever that means he moves, too fast, too sure. The blade slides easily in, and out the back. Dirk's hand tangles in white hair. Somehow in the span of time he's knelt down far enough Komaeda's face can rest against his shoulder.]

You and I. We're a bit too much alike. Same self destructive stupidity.

[The sword is removed and he lays him down, brushing his hair out of his face.] Try not to fuck up with your guy okay? Hard. I know. But...well you're dying right now and I'm being the don't do this dumb shit guru.

[zanka]

[He laughs a little sheepishly.] Aha, I suppose that's true...

[But Komaeda trails off from whatever else he'd planned to say, smile slipping away as his mouth hangs open. That feeling from before comes back. "You do matter." It had taken his whole life for three people to say that to him, and the young man he's met in a single day has said as much more than once. There's an ache that thuds in his chest with his heartbeat.

He's going to say something else, he thinks. Perhaps try to deny that he does, in fact, matter, even though it would taste like a lie in his mouth with the feeling still resounding in his chest. Maybe ask how he could possibly be haunting him, when Komaeda isn't even sure what it is that he's done that's so familiar.

Whatever it is he's going to say is ripped away from him, because even though he'd told himself over and over that he would be prepared, Komaeda is crying out in pain as the sword tears through him.

He shouldn't get to react to pain; he should be able to handle it, to bear it and endure without a sound. But it hurts, and he's human, and it seems even that is too much for him to manage.

It's... strange. Between the life fading from him and the pain, it's difficult to focus, but... There's another feeling in his chest, as he registers the sensation of Dirk's fingers in his hair. It's not unlike what he'd already experienced, but this is... different. More intense, and more present, and his eyes burn and sting as if he's about to cry. If anyone ever touched him that way before, it's been too long for him to remember.

Komaeda coughs as he's set down, and tries not to think about what he feels in his throat. There's a finality to this, something more tangible and solid than being told he has six months left to live. An inexplicably sad feeling wells up in him as his eyes follow the movement of Dirk's hand.

Is that what you meant, he thinks, when you told me to stop haunting you?

Komaeda had thought he didn't know anything about him. But it seems he was terribly wrong, after all.

Vision gets blurrier, breathing gets harder. Thinking steadily becomes more difficult, but the words "your guy" still bounce about insistently in Komaeda's head. Your. My. Mine. Hinata isn't "his" - for so many reasons, he isn't his. Because he was beneath him, and now he's above. Because no one would ever be with a person who always said cruel things about them. Because Komaeda is a terrible person who shouldn't want him, but still does anyway.

He speaks, but that's not what he says.]

's too late. I already did. [His voice is little more than a choked, rattling thing that leaves his lips. Talking hurts, and not just in the physical way.] Won't want me. Shouldn't want me.

[He blinks, and he finally feels the wetness on his lashes.]

But... I'll try not to die.

[That isn't what he meant to say. It's what he wanted to say. He's only been saying the things he wants since he got stabbed, and he shouldn't...

Komaeda doesn't get the things he wants. Everything he wants is torn away from him and broken in front of his face. He'd thought he had mastered not wanting anything at all.

Yet now, as he's dying so he can live again...]

You... [His eyes search the face above him. His breaths are very slow and weak, now. He has a moment more, at the very most.] You never told me your name.

[timaeus_testified]

Dirk Strider. [He continues to kneel while brushing his fingers through Komaeda's hair. He doesn't entirely get why he's doing it. It just seems to fit the situation. From the look on Komaeda's face, he has never had anyone truly give a damn about him. Even in the far flung future where everything was under water he always had Foxy.

How would he have turned out? Evil. If Dave has the right of how his Bro came to be. He won't say Komaeda is evil. Just destructive. A danger to himself and others as long as his purpose is flying in the wind without anyone there to tell him what is fucked up about his path.

He shifts, moving to sit on the edge of the slab.]

Guess that makes two of us in the fuck up category. It's alright. There's always say sorry, and try to mend the fences. Can always say sorry. At least...until you do too much.

Just don't be a coward and own the fuck up to what you did at the start.

[zanka]

[Saying sorry... He wonders if it's really that simple. If Hinata would even accept an apology from him after the things he's said about him.

But... Perhaps his brain that works too hard is simply over-complicating things once again. It wouldn't be the first time, and it wouldn't be the last...

Maybe he has a chance after all. That's a pretty hopeful thought.

Komaeda doesn't spend his words on it, though, because he only has a few left to spare. So he nods, smiles, and it's probably the most genuine look to grace his face since all of this started.]

Dirk Strider... [No honorific. He isn't quite sure why, but it doesn't feel necessary. Not right now.] What an interesting person you are.

[It goes unnoticed by Komaeda with the state that he's in, but pale-colored songbirds are starting to gather near the Bed. They land at the ledge, heads perked up like they're watching and waiting for something to happen.]

To the man who saved me, and helped me save myself... Thank you.

[His eyes fall shut, hands go slack. The red stain on his dress shirt, small at first, has grown to a considerable size. And as if that's what the flock has been waiting for, the birds fly to the sides of his body and, ever so faintly, they begin to glow.

Then there is a flash of light, rainbow color covering him like a second skin, his body is lifting up past Dirk's grasp and-

And Somewhere Else, Komaeda Nagito opens his eyes.]